Trying to Heal

Again, I want to thank everyone for the words of encouragement. I won't be able to thank you all individually, but every word means so much to me.

I'm doing a little better today. The tears still come, often at random times, but at least they aren't the gut-wrenching sobs from yesterday.

Fiona is doing better than she was yesterday. I'm still keeping a close eye on her and she's living in the house right now. She's drinking on her own- I have her bowl filled with homemade pedialyte. Apparently it tastes delicious, because I caught one of my cats dipping his paw in the bowl to get himself a taste.

My barn has AC. That's a misleading comment, because the AC is not there to get the rabbits cold. It's there to keep them alive. I kept it turned on to keep the temperature bearable in the hot summer months. On days in the spring, fall, and winter when it's cool outside, the AC went off and the windows were opened to allow the breeze to flow through the rabbitry.

The barn I have isn't my first option on how I'd like to keep the rabbits. Unfortunately, because Tim is a pastor, we move around a lot. There are certain standards I have to maintain in the barn- it's physical appearance for one and the ability to move it for another. The other option, building something cheap, usually violates the physical appearance rule. Our house is not our own.

Thus, this is why we have the barn we have and the AC to keep the temperature from being overwhelming. I was careful to stress to Tim I always wanted to make sure the rabbits didn't become too dependent on AC. I didn't want to worry about them not being able to handle the heat of a summer show and I didn't want them to have problems when they went to a new rabbitry. I could put at least another stacker and another row of cages on top of the existing stackers in the barn, but I haven't because I was worried that it would just contribute to the heat in the building. Not to mention warm air rises and sitting just under the rafters would be uncomfortable in all circumstances, but deadly in the summer particularly.

Unfortunately, I made a mistake with the AC that led to the death of the rabbits. I've always thought the way the dial is set on a lot of them was stupid. I was running late for work, I thought I clicked the dial to "high cool". Instead, it was on "low fan". That led to high temperatures in the rabbitry. Even without the AC, if both windows had been open, I think I would have lost some animals. It was a very hot day and the only shade for the rabbitry is what we've manufactured ourselves.

I'm at a loss now about what to do. I could find someone to cut and install more windows and try to completely move away from the AC, but there is still no shade. I could buy a bigger AC, but in the case of a power outage or human error, that's not a lot of help. I could sell out.

All my options are on the table right now. I've just got decide what to do and what we can afford to do.

I'm blessed in that there are so many Tryon offspring in my barn I can't name them all- I find myself looking with surprise at a pedigree and seeing his name yet again. I've got multiple G.C. bucks that are his sons and others that are his nephews. He can live on through them, but it's just not going to be the same. I can't even bring myself to close the door to his cage, but the sight of it sends me in to tears.

-Kristen
Keep's Rabbitry